1. As a kid, my summer was defined by 3 months of vacation. As a work drone, my summer is about days I’m not sweating on the train platform.

2. I’ve been having problems sleeping lately. This is why you shouldn’t buy ghosts who only speak to you at night. I want a refund, dammit.

3. Someone asked me: why do men think watching lesbians is so hot? My answer: simple math. Watching one woman = hot. Two women = hotter. Duh.

4. Somfucius say: man who allows time to keep on slipping into the future will not fly like an eagle, but may hear cheesy space sound effect.

5. I wonder if sleep deprivation can cause schizophrenia. What do you think, Somfucius? Somfucius say: man who conversates in tweet is fucked.

6. If your life is ending one minute at a time, then spending 160 minutes on a train everyday must mean I’ll be dead in a year or so. Peachy!

7. Let me be clear: I don’t have a death wish. But if I can fake my death, get a black Trans Am, and go foil villains… Well, that would rock.

8. I smile a lot. This is my only explanation why the universe is happy to let cilantro and spinach get caught in my teeth as often as it does.

9. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by Monday AM me talking about how much work he got done this weekend. Not buying it, are you? Damn.

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.***