1. Beautiful weather this AM, great to hit the beach. Unfortunately I’m sitting in an outdated metal box on my way to a view of a taupe wall.

2. Can you believe my teeth still fucking hurt from the dental cleaning yesterday? It felt like I tried to chew on a belt sander. And lost.

3. Someone needs to fucking start a trending topic that we can all fucking get behind. #fbombfriday

4. In the future, trains will be equipped with fart detectors. When someone cuts one, an alarm goes off with a big red arrow above the culprit.

5. I heard there’s a fashion movement to revive Z Cavaricci pants. Knock that shit off, it needs at least another 9 yrs for solid retro status.

6. My iPhone was acting up B4 I went on vacation. It’s been fine since I returned though. Remember, your job stress affects the ones you love.

7. From the SomBlock Mailbag: “Hey, you need to stop pretending to be a devil.” -G, CA [You're incorrect. I'm pretending to be El Diablo.]

8. Damn synapses clicking on & off again. My iPhone keeps changing into a gun. Then a wet salmon. Then Selma Hayek. Damn, back to iPhone.

9. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by the good of humanity, because without it, we’d just have a world of sex, drinking & gambling. Wait.

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.***