SomBlock In Reverse: 7/24/09

1. Up up and away on my beautiful, my beautiful balloon full of drugs that I swallowed to get through US customs and make $100.

2. As advertised, I’ll officially be on vacation by day’s end. This will throw time & space into a vortex, & may cause the Earth constipation.

3. If you die while away on vacation, what’s the most embarassing possession that people cleaning out your house would find? Fess up sinners!

4. It’s not too embarrassing if someone finds a sex toy in your house, but rather if it’s an excessively large or life-size sex toy.

5. I wouldn’t mind a peek into the future. But if things sucked, I might be scared to look back at the present. I’ll stick with the mystery.

6. There’s a specific reason I don’t have more than one wife. I’m just not a big fan of that whole jealous-rage-murder-suicide thing.

7. I asked the Verizon guy if I’ll have 3G while I’m in Puerto Rico next week, and he snarkly replied “You’re on AT&T, motherfucker.”

8. Is it true that Verizon owns the face, voice, eternal soul, and all major resellable organs of the Verizon guy?

9. Somfucius say: man who talk too much shit may end up eating it.

10. Seeing as how I drink apricot flavored beer, I suppose I could give a taste test to blueberry flavored coffee. But it sounds disgusting.

11. Depending on cell service in PR, the SomBlock may be on vacation next week too. But I hope not, as I expect many good Gringo observations.

12. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by all the disgruntled work drones who are flipping me the bird as I fly away on vacation. See ya!

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.***