1. Happy Monday! I learned the hard way that the benefits of getting to bed before 1AM is voided if you wake up at 5AM.

2. I don’t know how women can use that eyelash curling pincher thing. I would totally pop my eyeball out of my skull by accident.

3. What exactly can Phil Collins feel coming in the air tonight? Hopefully not that godawful street cred killing theme to Tarzan: The Movie.

4. Is it strange that songs that I hate most were #1 hits? Am I a nonconformist? Well, if conforming is liking crap music, I’ll live with it.

5. In human history, I’m wondering how many times the words ‘filet’ and ‘fellate’ have been misheard for each other.

6. A cloud of humidity from outside has followed me into my train. You know it’s sad when the Subway has better A/C than Metro-North.

7. Dear Spammers, photos of cute girls as your avatar won’t get me to follow you. I will however glance at it before blocking your dumb ass.

8. This AM’s SomBlock is…*CRASH* Who told ya MFers you could use this iPhone? There’s a name outside that says Mark’s iPhone. I’m f-ing Mark.

9. There comes a time in all person’s lives when they must acknowledge that having a make-believe personality is more financially advantageous.

10. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by the hand that feeds killer whales, because it sure as hell ain’t going to be my hand.

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.***