1. You know you’re going to have a weird morning when you wake up and your iPhone is advising you to wear your spacesuit and bring a bullwhip.

2. I don’t suppose anyone has an Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator I can borrow? I need to get rid of Thursday and Friday.

3. For some odd reason, when I see SyFy (the Sci-Fi’s new branding), I add a T in there and hear Beavis and Butthead saying “I got a stiffy!”.

4. Rebranding can be really tough. I tried it once, but nobody bought that I was actually an Austrian basketball hero, despite my great accent.

5. Hmm, the babbling madman sensor on my iPhone has been malfunctioning all this time. Uh oh what’d you hear me say? I swear none of it’s true.

6. Dear Death, I forbid you from taking any of these famous people: Thom Yorke, Trent Reznor, Jeff Tweedy, Dan Auerbach, & Boba Fett. Thanks!

7. Most people are afraid of Death. I find it’s better to talk to him, offer a nice microbrew, ask about his day, maybe shoot some hoops.

8. Legend has it that petite and attractive Latin women who can also cook your pants off are definite keepers.

9. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by the sound of my voice, as it’s rather husky from allergies and I charmed my iPhone’s voice controls.

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.***