1. Happy Monday! It’s time to welcome the morning perspiration of summertime with open arms… Wait, on second thought, never mind.

2. I went 72 hours without tweeting. Of course, I make it sound like I just kicked cigarettes, and yet here I am again. Smoke em if you got em!

3. Actually, doctors have found that tweeting produces chemicals in the brain that aid in self-concept. These chemicals are called egomania.

4. Of course, egomania in a corporate artist’s mind is kind of like when Clark Griswold gets lost in the Bronx.

5. Some people spread rumors that being an artist is a glorifying & rewarding career. Yes, I’ve already sent out the ninjas for these people.

6. Twitter celebrities spend the AM replying to people’s tweets. I spend that time replying to my own tweets. This is the highlight of my day.

7. If my sarcasm gets any thicker, it’s going to form a gelatinous force field that starts answering phones for me. Maybe that won’t be so bad.

8. Eye headaches are usually a good indicator that you should stop looking at yourself in the mirror in hope that you’ll become good looking.

9. This morning’s SomBlock is sponsored by this past Friday morning’s SomBlock. It’s totally mocking us and it must be silenced!

*** Every weekday from 8-9am while traveling from Stamford to Manhattan, Mark Sahm writes a block of thoughts on his Twitter account (@Somrod) via his iPhone.