We follow our individual philosophies to the end, or until we find a better philosophy. In regards to getting the big “break” as a creative person, I’ve often lived by the philosophy that it will only happen through the combination of hard work, research and timing. For most of my adult life, I’ve followed this. But the reality is that as hard as I can work, trying hundreds of avenues that potentially lead to the “break”, it has not happened.
Over the past 15 months, since I launched Magic Junk, I have tried to work smarter and while I’ve gotten some notoriety for it, it has never offered much promise. I suppose if all I sought was attention, I achieved it. However, in terms of branching out into a career, I am still leagues away. Right now, all I have are an elaborate collection of hobbies. While the U.S. Government will declare that statement official in three years, I can continue trying to construct my little creative niche for now.
I was getting coffee this morning, and a coworker lamented to me about how many of his Lotto picks were only a number off from the winners. I admit that while I play the Lotto as well, I don’t really play to win. I play so that as an old man, I never have to say, “Well, I shoulda played the Lotto, and maybe I would have found my big break.” I consider it a retroactive way of avoiding regret. This philosophy has worked for me in the past, as participating in an online dating service, just to say I tried, allowed me to meet my wife. Was it luck, or properly fulfilled philosophy?
However, while the desire and belief to win does not sway the Lotto much, it does alter how our creative endeavors pan out. Most times, entering a situation with some optimism and enthusiasm can only help your project. All too often, I have found that I create as an extension of despair, as an escape from the cubicle bound career that I have been trapped into— but not with optimism. It’s my belief that was why my first novel has such a negative overtone to it. You cannot finish the book without the overbearing sense of the harsh reality the characters dwell in.
As I am dangerously close to beginning the initial writing for my second novel, I find that I can either stick to my old unbreakable philosophies for approaching a project, or I can try to learn from my mistakes. Thus, even if I shall be let down, I have to believe that this time, I cannot just go through the motions. This time, I have to believe that the break will come.